Forgiveness

What is forgiveness? Forgiveness means not to dwell on the sin that was forgiven to the offender. It is a promise not to raise the issue again to the offender, or to others or himself or herself. Even ‘brooding on the issue’ is a violation of the promise made in granting forgiveness to the offender.

A definition for forgiveness could be -- giving up my right to hurt you, for hurting me. It is impossible to live on this fallen planet without getting hurt, offended, misunderstood, lied to, and rejected. Learning how to respond properly is one of the basics of the Christian life.¹

The word “forgive” means to wipe the slate clean, to pardon, to cancel a debt. When we wrong someone, we seek his or her forgiveness in order for the relationship to be restored. It is important to remember that forgiveness is not granted because a person deserves to be forgiven. Instead, it is an act of love, mercy, and grace.²

Reconciliation is a complete change of relationships between persons; God and man; and man, and man and this involves three basic elements.

a.) Confessing our sins to God, and to any other offended party;

b.) Forgiveness by God and by the offended party;

c.) Establishing a new relationship between God and the offender; and the offender and the offended party.

Confession, forgiveness, and reconciliation are very much related and in reconciliation, the enmity and alienation are replaced by peace and fellowship.

God’s Mercy: “And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.” Jesus Christ taught His disciples the Lord’s Prayer for forgiveness, and we stand before God’s mercy and grace every day for the sins of commission and omission.

(Debt vs. Trespasses) Several Greek words are used to describe sin, and the Gospel of Matthew uses the word, ophelema, which is rendered ‘debt’ Matt 6:12; and paraptoma, which is rendered ‘trespass’ in Matt 6:14. God will forgive us only as much as we forgive those who have injured us, and in the Lord’s Prayer we ask God to be merciful and forgive our sins. “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (1 Jn 1:9).  

Praying for forgiveness requires listening quietly in God’s presence so that He may reveal to us our own acts of disobedience, our resentments, and our unresolved issues in our hearts and even with our neighbors.  As Christians we inevitably continue to sin, but our lives need to be characterized by a reducing frequency of sin with an increasing sensitivity to sin.

When God forgives a sinner, He marks a new beginning, and the old has gone. He wanted that the matters which the repentance concerned must be cleared up, and bear fruit which is appropriate to true repentance. This leads to change in relationships, which leads to the abandonment of old ways (putting off) and the establishment of new ways (putting on).

In some difficult cases, for example if the offended party refuses to give forgiveness, then the Scriptures in Matthew 18, comes into effect. The first step is the repentant party approaches the person regarding the issue and if that fails, he takes one or two witnesses. Jesus Christ makes the forgiveness of the repentant brother very mandatory, (Lk. 17).

It is very understandable that the offended person is somewhat wary for a period especially when the offense is adultery, homosexuality, or incest. There may be a fear that the same transgression may be committed again. Forgiveness is not a shock treatment which instantly wipes away the hurtful memories of the recent past. The Biblical concept of forgiving and reconciling is a process and building a new relationship with the offender poses the following 2 questions.

a)  Has there been genuine repentance?

b) Has real forgiveness actually been granted? 

Very often the Biblical concept of forgiving and forgetting is misinterpreted; and the Scriptures speak of fruit appropriate to repentance. When one forgives the offender, forgetting is not possible immediately instead, the one, who forgives, remembers the offense, and looks for the fruit or the results that accompany the true repentance.

Let us look at the following illustration;

P -------à F₁ ---------àF₂ -------àF₃

P is the problem

F₁ is forgiveness

F₂ is fruit

F₃ is forgetting

When the fruit is fully discerned, then forgetting becomes possible slowly and it is a process, and the desire and the willingness of the forgiven offender to build a new relationship with the one who has forgiven becomes very evident.

While God in His providence, sometimes may wish to bring about the consequences of sin in the life of the offender, for His purposes; Ps. 99:8, the forgiver has no right to take the providence in to their hands. However, when the consequence of sin becomes evident in the life of the offender, God does not intend to make the forgiven sinner suffer. Christ suffered for the sinner, and neither man nor God may require further atonement.³

God reconciles us to Himself through Christ and counts our sins against us no more. “And all things are of God, who hath reconciled us to Himself by Jesus Christ, and hath given to us the ministry of reconciliation; To wit, that God was in Christ, reconciling the world unto Himself, not imputing their trespasses unto them; and hath committed unto us the word of reconciliation” (2 Cori 5:18-19).

Websites:

1. Definition for Forgiveness ^1,2

www.allaboutgod.com › Forgiving Others - Learn More! - CachedSimilar

Definition for Forgiveness - Read a definition of forgiveness and thoughts about when to ... The Bible gives us much instruction when it comes to forgiveness. ...

►References:

1.The Matthew Henry Study Bible, ‘King James version’ The best of Matthew Henry’s Notes in a Handy One Volume Reference Bible, World Bible Publishers, Inc; 1994, Iowa Falls, U.S.A.

2. Beth Moore, David Seeking A Heart Like His, Life Way Christian resources, Nashville, Tennessee, 2010, pgs: 206-210.

3. Jay E. Adams, ‘Critical Stages of Biblical Counseling’ Finishing Well, Breaking Through, Getting Started, (New Jersey: Zondervan, 2002, p.6-7)

4. Jay E. Adams, ‘How to Help People Change’ The Four-step Biblical Process, (Grand rapids: Zondervan, 1986, p. 20-28)

5. John F. MacArthur, JR. Wayne A. Mack & The Master’s College Faculty, ‘Introduction To Biblical Counseling’, “A Basic Guide To The Principles And Practice Of Counseling”(Nashville: Thomas Nelson Publishers,1994, P. 76-77).

6. Jay E. Adams, ‘The Christian Counselor’s Manual, The Practice of Nouthetic Counseling’ (Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 1973, p. 15-16, 21-23; 61-70³; 92-97).

7. Jay E. Adams, ‘Lectures on Counseling’ (Grand Rapids: Baker Book House, 1978, p.192-203).

8.The Holy Bible, New King James version, Women of Destiny Bible, “Women Mentoring women Through the Scriptures” A Spirit Filled Life Bible, Thomas Nelson Publishers, Nashville, Tennessee, Copyright 1982. 

9. H. Michael Brewer, ‘Lessons from the Carpenter’ An Apprentice Learns from Jesus, Published by Water Brook Press, Colorado, 2006; pgs 50-59.

10. Jesus’ Teaching on Prayer, the Lord’s Prayer, ‘Know God’s Power and Forgiveness Through the Seven Petitions’ Rose Publishing, California.

11. Charles Price, Living Truth, Experiencing Christ in You, ‘Journey into the Heart of God’ Charles, Toronto.